Rest in peace, my friend

I’m still in shock at the news of Ori’s passing and I don’t know where to begin so I’ll start at the beginning.

I met Ori in 2001. I was a second year PhD student at Boston College and he was just beginning his first year. We hit it off right from the get-go. It was one of those “great chemistry” friendships where we just had the same vibe.

As with any good friend, we shared a lot of laughs and engaged in many long discussions about technology, psychology, society, and beyond. Ori was originally from Israel and he would laugh at the way my Canadian accent came out when I spoke Hebrew to him. On several occasions, he reminisced at how his sister sounded equally amusing when she was practicing French during her younger years.

His love of the band “The Church” was unparalleled and he talked about them all the time. We’d listen to their music while in his apartment as he introduced me to the latest innovations in DVD visual and sound technology.

He was the first person I knew to walk around his apartment building and up the street in his Boston neighbourhood looking for a wi-fi signal to get wireless Internet on his laptop. At the time, I had no idea what he was doing and thought he was simulatenously hilarious and nuts!

I’m sure many of his friends have stories of how Ori helped them with something. Oddly enough, Ori was my computer saviour. He had run his own computer company at one point and when my computer crashed, he came over and sent me on errands around the city to get him the parts he needed to fix it. It’s one of those “you had to be there” stories but he came through in the end.

Ori wasn’t a major partier but we did have some great, memorable nights out together. We always had so much to say and he was fun to hang out with. He was very intelligent and worldly, two qualities that I admired in him.

After a couple of years, he decided to move to Australia to complete his PhD there. He was selling off his belongings for the journey and I bought his DVD player, which I still use (and every time I use it, I think of him). Even though he moved to the opposite end of the planet, we still kept in touch via email and skype. He raved about Bondi Beach in Sydney and was thrilled about the opportunities to go scuba diving which he loved. In something of a dream, he met up with the band members of The Church and befriended them.

He finally completed his PhD at Murdoch University and became a registered psychologist. We recently discussed the future of his private practice and on-going research.

In 2007, we talked about how he needed more publications to further boost his career as an academic. I had already entered the business world full time but devoted personal resources to help him with the continuation of my research on pathological Internet use (from years earlier). He collected data while working in Japan and we were planning more data collection and publications.

I had not heard from Ori in several weeks. Then, I found out that on May 27, 2008, he had taken his life in Switzerland because assisted suicide is legal there. His ashes were scattered and a farewell email went out to a select few people. He was in constant pain due to a physical illness few people knew he had.

Ori appreciated the important things in life. He valued his freedom and lived in several cites around the world. To this day, I am amazed at how he could just pick up and move to a far off city. 

Ori, you are sorely missed. You passed on before your time. Our lives are richer for having known you and our hearts go out to you.

Rest in Peace,

Brian

Other Memorials

My Space - Ori Ashman

Google Groups - Ori Ashman - Seance List

People who knew Ori are welcomed to write their own story or kind words. (Click “Comments” below).

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